“What do you get when cross an Italian with a gorilla?
A retarded gorilla”
“How many men does it take to open a beer?
None, the beer should be open when SHE brings it!”
“What does a black kid get for Christmas?
“How did the Grand Canyon get there?
Two Jews dropped a quarter down a gopher hole.”
Why is a blonde like an old washing machine?
They both drip when they’re fucked.
what do you get when you put a baby in a box full of razor blades and kick it down a flight of stairs? an erection.
What is 18 inches long, stiff and makes women scream at night?
How can you tell when your sister is on her period?
Your dad’s dick tastes funny.
Why Do They Using Mexicans Instead Of Laboratory Rats In Experiments Now?
Mexicans breed faster and you don’t get so attached to them.
How did the Virgin Mary know Jesus was gay?
His dick tasted like shit.
Whats the difference between pink and purple?
How do you stop 5 black guys from raping a white girl?
Give them a basketball.
What did Jesus do when he got to the Holiday Inn?
He threw some nails down on the counter and asked,
How do you make a dead baby float?
Take your foot off its head!
How did Jesus walk on water?
What’s the first thing a woman does when she gets out of the battered wives’ shelter? The dishes, if she knows what’s good for her.
How do you get a nun pregnant?
Dress her up like an altar boy.
Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman?
Because a woman who can’t even afford a washing machine will never be able to support you.
What do you call a black guy flying an aeroplane?
The pilot, you racist fuck.
What’s the difference between Santa Claus and a Jew?
Santa Claus goes down the chimney.
What’s better than winning a gold medal in the Special Olympics?
Not being retarded.
How do you make a little girl cry even more?
You wipe your bloody dick off on her teddy bear.
Did you hear Micheal Jackson was found dead?
He got food poisoning from an 11 year old wiener.
How do you get a gay man to have sex with a woman?
Take a dump in her vagina.
How do you starve a black guy?
Hide his food stamps under his work boots.
Whats better than having sex with a 12 yr. old vietnamese boy? NOTHING
Why don’t black people take cruises?
They fell for that trick once already!
What’s the difference between a Catholic Priest and acne?
Acne doesn’t come on a boys face until after he’s thirteen.